You Got To Do What You Got To Do

A Topic Not Discussed

Some want to become caregivers and others it is a cultural issue to take care of their parents. Many others have no choice but to actually care for their parents. There is no money for any of the other options. This is being done on a daily basis by tens of thousands of people. They feed them, dress them, change the diapers, wash them and clean up the big messes. All without any fanfare or recognition.

Most advertising about caring for a parent is supported by senior associations, assisted living center and home care agencies telling you what you should do. They hire celebrities to talk about what they did and how they know what’s best for the rest of us. Why do they know best, because they are famous, got paid for the advertising or they can afford other options? Did they actually do the work to care for their parent? Celebrities talk about being a caregiver. I don’t want to be mean but do they actually change the diapers, give their parent a bath, clean them after a bad bowel movement? Or did they hire a nurse, caregiver or personal tech to do those jobs. I’m sure some have actually done some of the work but most because of their position probably can hire someone to do the disgusting jobs.

That is one of the reasons I wrote my book because no one represents the average person. With the senior associations you have no credibility because you have no verified credentials and are not part of the establishment. It is so hard for an unknown that has actually done the work to get their point across. That’s why my book is self published and self marketed. I could not get anyone to listen to my story even though it is a challenge that is happening everyday in tens of thousands of homes. Most associations and media organizations are not interested in regular people. I have contacted hundreds of media outlets and have had success with a few that thought my story was interesting enough to their viewers. For those television stations I am extremely grateful. Others have absolutely no interest or want you to pay to get access to their television shows. If I was famous or a celebrity I would be on television and radio stations across the country even if I didn’t do the work to care for my parents. But being an average person, you don’t get the time of day.

Well I’ve done the job and I feel I did it very well, just look at the result. My mom was not expected to survive long after her spine surgery and she did. She lasted 13 years longer than expected and was able to see her great grandchildren and be a part of their lives. That was because of the care she received and I was the one that gave her that care.

My goal is to inform as many people as possible of the real life challenge that might be ahead of them. I know the paperback is expensive and the book is not a great literary work but it is real life. It contains a lot of useful information that might help you in deciding to care for an elderly parent. The book details the burden and the enormous responsibility of being a caregiver. It is written by an average person that actually did all the work.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

James Colozzo
Author-“You Got To Do What You Got To Do”
www.takingcareofaparent.com

James Colozzo is not a medical expert or professional and has no formal training or education on this subject. He is an average person that was given a challenge and had to deal with the situation. His experience comes from the over 20 years that he actually did all the work to care for his elderly parents and their medical conditions. Since every person, condition and situation is different, what Mr. Colozzo did to care for his parents might not be suitable for others. You need to partner with your physician to find what type of care is best for your situation.
Copyright © 2019 James Colozzo

To make a comment please email author@takingcareofaparent.com

Advice From Others

Over the years of taking care of my mom we came in contact with many so-called caregiving experts. Every time she was in the hospital someone would visit and tell us what was best or what we needed. The one thing that was common with all these so-called experts was that none of them had ever cared for a parent. The way I found out was I asked them directly if they ever took care of a parent. The answer was always the same, “No.” You are always told this is the best way to do this or that and when you listen to some of this advice you ask yourself, “Would I want to be treated like that?” Most of the time the answer is, “No,” and you realized the advice you have received made no sense. I started asking some people when they gave advice that I thought was ridiculous, “Would you do that to your mom?” Most of the time they would not answer the question and say, “I’m not in that situation,” or “I’ll deal with it when it happens,” or my favorite, “my mom is different.” Everyone’s situation is different so there is not a “one size fits all” mentality when it comes to being a caregiver. What works for someone else might not work for you. There are a lot of guides that tell you what is the best technique for many situations. There are also a lot of people that will offer advice on anything that you do.

During the course I was a caregiver I received a lot of advice. It came from doctors, registered nurses, licensed vocational nurses, home health nurses, rehabilitation specialists, lab technicians, pulmonary technicians, pharmacists, hospital social workers, dietitians, nutritionist and many others. If any healthcare professional gives you advice it is because they have seen numerous incidents of how people take care of a parent. Advice also came from friends and family. I always listened and asked myself if this advice would work in our situation. A lot of times it didn’t, but on the few occasions that it did, it made a difference in the way I was taking care of my mom and dad.

There is no harm in asking for advice because it might help you with your caregiving duties. Any advice that can make things better for your parent and easier for you can go a long way into maintaining the quality of life for both of you. One thing to remember is that because every situation is different, the book is still being written on how to be a caregiver and it will never be finished.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

James Colozzo
Author-“You Got To Do What You Got To Do”
www.takingcareofaparent.com

James Colozzo is not a medical expert or professional and has no formal training or education on this subject. He is an average person that was given a challenge and had to deal with the situation. His experience comes from the over 20 years that he actually did all the work to care for his elderly parents and their medical conditions. Since every person, condition and situation is different, what Mr. Colozzo did to care for his parents might not be suitable for others. You need to partner with your physician to find what type of care is best for your situation.
Copyright © 2019 James Colozzo

To make a comment please email author@takingcareofaparent.com

You Know Your Parent

No one knows your parent better than you during the time you are taking care of them. As that care continues you will notice even more. This comes in very handy when you have to tell their condition to a doctor. They forget a lot and it will be up to you to tell the doctors of certain problems and conditions.

I knew things about them that they didn’t know themselves such as sleeping and eating habits. Over the years of taking care of them I knew how certain medications would affect them and how we could counteract it. I knew what they could tolerate and what made them sick. I probably knew them better than I knew myself.

This knowledge comes from the day to day care of your parent. You will learn all their quirks and mannerisms if you already don’t know what they are. You will be able to tell a reaction before there is an action and you will know the result before something starts. All this information will go a long way in helping your doctors diagnose and treat your parent. It will also go a long way in helping you care for your parents.

Being a caregiver to your parent puts you in a unique position as far as their medical condition. You see everything that they do, how they react and how something affects them. When you take them to the doctors or hospital you are their eyes, ears and nose.

You know their conditions like a book and you can relay that information to the doctor. You know how certain treatments affect their condition and how they react. Certain medications might cause an adverse reaction and you are the first one that will notice and you can relay this information to the doctor. You know everything about them and you can relay this information to any medical professional that needs it. A lot of times the elderly don’t understand or hear what they are being told by a doctor and that can cause problems during their treatment. Many times when I was taking care of my dad and mom they would hear something completely different from what the doctor was actually saying. Sometimes they didn’t hear or understand the problem or treatment and it was good that I was in the room because I heard everything the doctor said. It all depends on your parents condition and how much they are still involved in their healthcare but you become their safety net. If they are confused about a treatment or medication you can discuss it with them and call the doctor for verification.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

James Colozzo
Author-"You Got To Do What You Got To Do"
www.takingcareofaparent.com

James Colozzo is not a medical expert or professional and has no formal training or education on this subject. He is an average person that was given a challenge and had to deal with the situation. His experience comes from the over 20 years that he actually did all the work to care for his elderly parents and their medical conditions. Since every person, condition and situation is different, what Mr. Colozzo did to care for his parents might not be suitable for others. You need to partner with your physician to find what type of care is best for your situation.
Copyright © 2018 James Colozzo


To comment, please email author@takingcareofaparent.com